Friendship is above reason, for, though you find virtues in a friend, he was your friend before you found them. It is a gift that we offer because we must; to give it as the reward of virtue would be to set price upon it and those who do that have no friendship to give. If you choose your friends on the ground that you are virtuous and want virtuous company. You are no nearer to true friendship than if you choose them for commercial reasons. Besides, who are you that you should be setting a price upon your friendship? It is enough for any man that he has the divine power of making friends, and he must leave it to that power to determine who his friends shall be. For, though you may choose the virtuous to be your friend, they may not choose you; indeed, friendship cannot grow where there is any calculated choice. It comes like sleep, when you are not thinking about it; and you should be grateful, without any misgiving, when it comes.
So no man who knows what friendship is ever gave up a friend because he turns out to be disreputable. His only reason for giving up a friend is that he has ceased to care for him; and, when that happens he should reproach himself for this mortal poverty of affection, not the friend for having proved unworthy. For it is inhuman presumption to say any woman, when you have fallen out of love with her, that she is unworthy of your love. In friendship and in love we are always humble, because we see that a free gift has been given to us; and to lose that humility because we have lost friendship or love is to take a pride in what should shame us.
Precis : True Friendship
Friendship is a natural gift. It cannot be argued or discussed. It develops instinctively. We do not contract friendship with a person either because he is virtuous or because we expect to gain something form him. To put a price on friendship is to degrade it. If we fall out with a friend, we should not find fault with him. We should rather blame ourselves for being unworthy of retaining the friendship.
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